冷え性は体だけに起こっているものと思われていますが、心でも冷え性は起きています。
心で起きている冷え性とは、強欲、利己的、冷酷、傲慢の４つです。
体は温めたら何とかなりますが、心の冷え性の強欲、利己的、冷酷、傲慢は満たそうとすればするほど他から孤立し理解を得られません。良い解決策、他からの助言も得られないまま孤独になります。解決策は無いということです。
私の経験ですが、心の冷え性を持った人かどうかが分かる見分け方があります。
それが「口ぐせ」です。
「あぁ…それは分かってますから」 「そうは言っても..」 「分かってくれないかなぁ…」
とくに話の途中で意見をかぶせてくる人、
最後まで話を聞かないで持論を話しだす人は 心が冷えています。
性格と言えばそれで済む問題ではありません。
私たちは人とつながっていますから、協調、調和を失い孤立すると生きていけません。
「私の気持ちは誰も分かって貰えない」
と思う気持ちは孤独で自分勝手な考え方ですから、
ますます心の冷え性を深めていきます。
これは誰でも起こりえることで「うつの入り口」なのです。
でも答えはその反対にあるのです。
自分だけが特別な問題を抱えている、自分は大変なんだ、悲惨なんだと感じていて
「私の気持ちは誰も分かって貰えない」と思っている人、
反対を考えてみてはどうでしょう。
「誰も分かって貰えない」の相対は「誰でも分かってあげられる」です。
自分と同じような境遇、経験をしている人に対し
「それ分かる分かる」
「大変だったね」
「その気持ち良く理解い出来ます」
こんな意見を言ってあげられるのに気付けていないのは もったいないですね。
「もらうこと」と「あげること」その違いだけなのです。
コメント
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